Profile for Know ye not Woodside?:
23, male, Wakefield. I work for a cosmetics manufacturer.
As I don't have any involvement in animal testing, please don't try to murder me or bomb my house.
And bear in mind that 99% of what I say on here is tongue-in-cheek.
A'm from t'Tarn, an' a tok lake a never fuckin' left. As tha'll know if tha's ever met me.
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
none
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
[read all their answers]
- a member for 4 years, 6 months and 23 days
- has posted 2585 messages on the main board
- has posted 43069 messages on the talk board
- has posted 19 messages on the links board
- (including 5 links)
- has posted 164 stories and 147 replies on question of the week
- They liked 148 pictures, 17 links, 1051 talk posts, and 55 qotw answers.
- Ignore this user
- Add this user as a friend
- send me a message
23, male, Wakefield. I work for a cosmetics manufacturer.
As I don't have any involvement in animal testing, please don't try to murder me or bomb my house.
And bear in mind that 99% of what I say on here is tongue-in-cheek.
A'm from t'Tarn, an' a tok lake a never fuckin' left. As tha'll know if tha's ever met me.
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
none
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
» I hurt my rude bits
I once
got hit very hard in the bollocks by a football and now, eight years on, I'm completely sterile.
I'm saving up to sue the PE teacher in question and my old LEA; my solicitors are monitoring the traffic from this page and receive 50p every time someone clicks "I like this!".
Thank you, thank you - you are so kind (etc.)
(Thu 13th Jul 2006, 22:46, More)
I once
got hit very hard in the bollocks by a football and now, eight years on, I'm completely sterile.
I'm saving up to sue the PE teacher in question and my old LEA; my solicitors are monitoring the traffic from this page and receive 50p every time someone clicks "I like this!".
Thank you, thank you - you are so kind (etc.)
(Thu 13th Jul 2006, 22:46, More)
» Rock and Roll Stories
I nearly got fucked by James Blunt
I mean, £40 for a ticket?! You must be joking.
(Thu 29th Jun 2006, 20:01, More)
I nearly got fucked by James Blunt
I mean, £40 for a ticket?! You must be joking.
(Thu 29th Jun 2006, 20:01, More)
» DIY fashion
[witty title]
[hilarious story about wearing masonry, with an optional implication of sexual deviance]
[witty quip and/or thinly-veiled attempt to persuade the readers to click "I Like This!"]
[joke about length of penis]
(Sat 26th Aug 2006, 20:29, More)
[witty title]
[hilarious story about wearing masonry, with an optional implication of sexual deviance]
[witty quip and/or thinly-veiled attempt to persuade the readers to click "I Like This!"]
[joke about length of penis]
(Sat 26th Aug 2006, 20:29, More)
» The thing I've been most ashamed of doing with a penis
Giving it the gift of sentience,
allowing it to apply for the job of Head of Comedy at Channel 4, and allowing it to approve the hiring (and subsequent heavy rotation) of Justin Lee Collins, Alan Carr and Russell Brand.
For that I can do naught but apologise.
(Thu 12th Mar 2009, 21:53, More)
Giving it the gift of sentience,
allowing it to apply for the job of Head of Comedy at Channel 4, and allowing it to approve the hiring (and subsequent heavy rotation) of Justin Lee Collins, Alan Carr and Russell Brand.
For that I can do naught but apologise.
(Thu 12th Mar 2009, 21:53, More)
» DIY Techno-hacks
Once, when we had lots of pallets at work that needed banding and strapping,
I invented a wonderful labour-saving device that enabled the bander/strapper to pass the end of the band underneath the pallet in a very confined space. It was a long bit of wood with notches sawed into the end - you threaded the end of the band into one of the notches, played out the band from its reel and hey presto, no more back-breaking acrobatics like trying to bend down in a tiny gap and retrieve the end of the band when it invariably ends up poking out of the sides instead of the other end.
Since most of you have probably spent your entire working life in offices and have never even gone near a warehouse, never mind worked in one, I've provided a nice explanatory diagram.
(Thu 20th Aug 2009, 16:35, More)
Once, when we had lots of pallets at work that needed banding and strapping,
I invented a wonderful labour-saving device that enabled the bander/strapper to pass the end of the band underneath the pallet in a very confined space. It was a long bit of wood with notches sawed into the end - you threaded the end of the band into one of the notches, played out the band from its reel and hey presto, no more back-breaking acrobatics like trying to bend down in a tiny gap and retrieve the end of the band when it invariably ends up poking out of the sides instead of the other end.
Since most of you have probably spent your entire working life in offices and have never even gone near a warehouse, never mind worked in one, I've provided a nice explanatory diagram.
Step 1. Step 2. Step 3. Step 4.
Unravel band. Thread band into notch. Push bit of wood Retrieve wood, with attached band,
under pallet. and carry on banding the pallet.
wood + notches--- __ ___
| / \ / \ <- head literally expanding with joy
+---------+ <- wrapped +---------+ | \__/ +---------+ \___/ +---------+
| | pallet | | | /\ | | | | |
| | | | v / \ | | /|\ | |
| | reel | | / \ | | / | \ | |
| | | | | # \ | | / | \#- | |
| | band v | | # /\ | | / \ # \ | |
+---------+ | _ +---------+ # _/ \ +---------+ _ / \ # \ +---------+ _
| | | | | | v / \ | | | | | | # / \ \ | |#|#|#|#|#- / \ / \# -|-|-|-|-|-|- / \
+---------+ ___\_/ +---------+ #___\_/ \ +---------- \___\_/ / # +---------+ \___\_/
(Thu 20th Aug 2009, 16:35, More)