Profile for The Togaboy:
Hi. Make yourself at home.
I know these are generaly hated here but: HERE!
RATE BEATTIE!!! HE NEEDS YOUR VOTE!!!
Rate teh Beattie!!!
Whilst you're here, why not check out my website about the remains of an abandonned hospital in Cornwall? It's good! (Okay, my web building skills are still a little rusty, but it's not too bad.)
You can find it here:
My lovely site!
It has things like this in it.
And this
Go on! It'll be fun!
Also! Why not find out what this is all about!
Bloody Todd!
Do you recognise this bloke? Is it you? If it is, you may like to know that you show up on a google search under 'Wanker'.
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Best answers to questions:
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- a member for 5 years, 11 months and 3 days
- has posted 3498 messages on the main board
- has posted 30 messages on the talk board
- has posted 273 messages on the links board
- (including 43 links)
- has posted 42 stories and 4 replies on question of the week
- They liked 105 pictures, 24 links, 0 talk posts, and 30 qotw answers.
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Hi. Make yourself at home.
I know these are generaly hated here but: HERE!
RATE BEATTIE!!! HE NEEDS YOUR VOTE!!!
Rate teh Beattie!!!
Whilst you're here, why not check out my website about the remains of an abandonned hospital in Cornwall? It's good! (Okay, my web building skills are still a little rusty, but it's not too bad.)
You can find it here:
My lovely site!
It has things like this in it.
And this
Go on! It'll be fun!
Also! Why not find out what this is all about!
Bloody Todd!
Do you recognise this bloke? Is it you? If it is, you may like to know that you show up on a google search under 'Wanker'.
 I am a Halo.I believe I am perfect. Others may not think so, but those others are wrong. What Sort of Hat Are You? |
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
» Encounters with Royalty
Many, many years ago,
when I was about two, Prince Charlie came to Australia to tour before he tied the knot with the ill fated Princess Di. I'm not sure how we ended up there but my parents took my brother and I to a polo match somewhere in Sydney that Chrlie was attending. Some time during the match, Mum wondered where I'd got to and was told by Dad 'Don't look, he's not with us.'
This was because I'd wandered inside the red tape of the royal enclosure, downed trolleys and was pissing on the ground about ten feet in front of Charlie. So there. Prince Charles has seen my dick.
(Fri 4th Aug 2006, 1:52, More)
Many, many years ago,
when I was about two, Prince Charlie came to Australia to tour before he tied the knot with the ill fated Princess Di. I'm not sure how we ended up there but my parents took my brother and I to a polo match somewhere in Sydney that Chrlie was attending. Some time during the match, Mum wondered where I'd got to and was told by Dad 'Don't look, he's not with us.'
This was because I'd wandered inside the red tape of the royal enclosure, downed trolleys and was pissing on the ground about ten feet in front of Charlie. So there. Prince Charles has seen my dick.
(Fri 4th Aug 2006, 1:52, More)
» Childhood Ambitions
I wanted to be a binman.
At te age of about six, I managed to make friends with the bin men that cleared our street once a week. Every Thursday morning, I'd run out into the street (still clad in only PJ's) and talk to the bin men while they emptied the streets crap into the truck. They'd then let me press the compactor button at least twice before I ran to the top of our cul de sac street to wave them away ino the distance. My brother had a fancy dress 'what I want to be when I grow up' theme birthday party. There is a photo of me wearing 'stubbie' shorts, a string vest and a knotted hankie 'hat', heaving a binbag full of paper.
I wonder what happened to my ambition?
(Sun 1st Apr 2007, 2:22, More)
I wanted to be a binman.
At te age of about six, I managed to make friends with the bin men that cleared our street once a week. Every Thursday morning, I'd run out into the street (still clad in only PJ's) and talk to the bin men while they emptied the streets crap into the truck. They'd then let me press the compactor button at least twice before I ran to the top of our cul de sac street to wave them away ino the distance. My brother had a fancy dress 'what I want to be when I grow up' theme birthday party. There is a photo of me wearing 'stubbie' shorts, a string vest and a knotted hankie 'hat', heaving a binbag full of paper.
I wonder what happened to my ambition?
(Sun 1st Apr 2007, 2:22, More)
» World's Sickest Joke
An old lady is walking down the street on a fine summer's day.
Birds are singing, there's flowers galore so she couldn't be happier. As the lady turns a corner, she spots a very little girl aged about six and says 'My, you're a pretty little thing! What's your name then?'
'Butterfly' replies the girl.
'Oh that's so sweet.' the old lady cries 'Why are you called that?'
'When I was in my mummy's tummy, a butterfly landed on it, and so I'm called Butterfly.'
The old lady walks on, happy and soon meets an even prettier little girl.
'Gosh! You are a pretty little lady! What's your name then?'
The little girl looks up and, with the slightest of lisps, angelicaly replies 'Oh, my name is Nightingale!'
The old lady is almost overcome and says 'Oh my! That's simply lovely! How did you come to be called that?'
'Well, when I was in my mummy's tummy, a nightingale landed on her and started to sing. So I'm called Nightingale.'
Our old friend nearly flies to the moon, she's so happy with this. Anyway, she walks on and, rounding a corner meets an ugly, deformed little girl and stops dead. Looking the child up and down she decides to try and be nice and says 'Hello little girl, what's your name then?'
The little girl looks up and replies 'Breezeblock......
(Thu 9th Sep 2004, 19:01, More)
An old lady is walking down the street on a fine summer's day.
Birds are singing, there's flowers galore so she couldn't be happier. As the lady turns a corner, she spots a very little girl aged about six and says 'My, you're a pretty little thing! What's your name then?'
'Butterfly' replies the girl.
'Oh that's so sweet.' the old lady cries 'Why are you called that?'
'When I was in my mummy's tummy, a butterfly landed on it, and so I'm called Butterfly.'
The old lady walks on, happy and soon meets an even prettier little girl.
'Gosh! You are a pretty little lady! What's your name then?'
The little girl looks up and, with the slightest of lisps, angelicaly replies 'Oh, my name is Nightingale!'
The old lady is almost overcome and says 'Oh my! That's simply lovely! How did you come to be called that?'
'Well, when I was in my mummy's tummy, a nightingale landed on her and started to sing. So I'm called Nightingale.'
Our old friend nearly flies to the moon, she's so happy with this. Anyway, she walks on and, rounding a corner meets an ugly, deformed little girl and stops dead. Looking the child up and down she decides to try and be nice and says 'Hello little girl, what's your name then?'
The little girl looks up and replies 'Breezeblock......
(Thu 9th Sep 2004, 19:01, More)
» Nightclubs
I was out in Cornwall's only city.
Truro is not the biggest city in the world, in fact as cities go, it is pretty tiny.
So, one 'all drinks for a quid' Monday, a group of us are out in the city's only proper nightclub that wasn't a gay club at the time. A few drinks...more drinks... and I find myself sitting in on a low stool trying to talk to a friend of mine. I can't hear her so I stand up slightly and lean over the table to hear what she's saying. When I go to sit down again, I feel for the stool that should be right behind me, but it is gone! I turn to see a rather large girl (I later discovered that she is locally known as 'Nanny' due to her resemblance to the 'Duckula' character) has stolen it from under me and is sitting upon. I ask for it back, she sticks her finger in her ear. I go to the other ear, the same thing happens. I stand there looking for a few seconds and then make a drunken decision. I bend down, grip the legs of the stool and pull hard. The stool comes out, Nanny hits the floor and her little chavvy mates jump and start waving their arms around in a threatening manner. They do nothing and sit back down as I'm just watching them with amusment. I always remember the thump that shook the floor...
(Thu 16th Apr 2009, 10:41, More)
I was out in Cornwall's only city.
Truro is not the biggest city in the world, in fact as cities go, it is pretty tiny.
So, one 'all drinks for a quid' Monday, a group of us are out in the city's only proper nightclub that wasn't a gay club at the time. A few drinks...more drinks... and I find myself sitting in on a low stool trying to talk to a friend of mine. I can't hear her so I stand up slightly and lean over the table to hear what she's saying. When I go to sit down again, I feel for the stool that should be right behind me, but it is gone! I turn to see a rather large girl (I later discovered that she is locally known as 'Nanny' due to her resemblance to the 'Duckula' character) has stolen it from under me and is sitting upon. I ask for it back, she sticks her finger in her ear. I go to the other ear, the same thing happens. I stand there looking for a few seconds and then make a drunken decision. I bend down, grip the legs of the stool and pull hard. The stool comes out, Nanny hits the floor and her little chavvy mates jump and start waving their arms around in a threatening manner. They do nothing and sit back down as I'm just watching them with amusment. I always remember the thump that shook the floor...
(Thu 16th Apr 2009, 10:41, More)