WHY?

( Sibod points and laughs at you, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:17, archived)

It's basically a combination of unhealthy diet and taking the internet too seriously.

( Jam Master Geordie The People's Champion of B3ta., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:17, archived)

JMG!
What does it sound like when doves cry? :(
( Undulating Tentacles of Love falling out the window with confetti in my hair, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:18, archived)

*coo-hoo*

(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:18, archived)

*limp wrists*

( Sibod points and laughs at you, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:20, archived)

A gay flirted with me.
I was looking at dinner jackets and an attractive guy comes up to me and asks "What size are you?" I dunno, so he looks me up and down for a second and says "Ooh, I think you're about *censored*" then walked off.
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:29, archived)

Was this scene being rated by the bbfc.

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:29, archived)

No, my self-worth issues and vanity.

( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:30, archived)

You hate yourself and want to die.

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:36, archived)

That was why I smoked like four fags while drunk last night even though I've never smoked and indeed I'm against smoking.
Meh...
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:37, archived)

You've just confirmed what I just typed.

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:38, archived)

fucking censored?!
are you some kind of retard or something?
( MONO! is a pirate, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:30, archived)

I'm vain and unfit
Meh...
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:31, archived)

You'd have to be over 30 stone to be any fatter than half the people here

( MONO! is a pirate, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:32, archived)

Not that yet
My dad is though.
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:33, archived)

i agree

( Rathen SOMEONE IS COMPLAINING TO THE MODS, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:31, archived)

A gay came on to me
I had to kill him because I'm uncomfortable with my own sexuality.

Sometimes I cut the eyes out of pictures in body building magazines and cry and cry and cry and cry and cry and cry and cry and cry
( Undulating Tentacles of Love falling out the window with confetti in my hair, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:31, archived)

cry and cry and cry and cry and cry and cry and cry and cry

put my penis through the hole
( Derek Monte yo home to bel air, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:33, archived)

I could go for that.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love falling out the window with confetti in my hair, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:34, archived)

Oh, that's a sad story there.
Perhaps with time and a little gentle surprise sex who might come to terms with it.
( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:35, archived)

I'd consider it a compliment to my outward masculinity if a gay man flirted with me.

( Woodsideindustrier Aktiebolag mocking GayBeards™ since, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:35, archived)

My, you're looking handsome tonight.

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:38, archived)

Why thank you.
But I must warn you now that I very rarely shave my chest.
( Woodsideindustrier Aktiebolag mocking GayBeards™ since, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:40, archived)

Ooh, I like that, something to run my fingers through.
You smell so nice, is that a new cologne.
( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:43, archived)

Oh yes.
It's a patented mixture of androstenone, eugenol and thioacetone.
( Woodsideindustrier Aktiebolag mocking GayBeards™ since, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:47, archived)

So that's why I want to mount you like a rampaging wildebeast.

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:54, archived)

This is how most COMFORTABLE men see it.

(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:39, archived)

Except I'm "unfussy" rather than "comfortable".

( Woodsideindustrier Aktiebolag mocking GayBeards™ since, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 1:00, archived)

Do you (ahem) work out?

( Derek Monte yo home to bel air, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:40, archived)

Not at all.
I have no need to work out, as I'm 6'4" and weigh a little under 13st (the average weight for my height is 14st 8lbs.)
( Woodsideindustrier Aktiebolag mocking GayBeards™ since, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:41, archived)

well i'm obviously shit a flirting
*take advice from gay men*
( Derek Monte yo home to bel air, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:45, archived)

I've been complimented by straight men,
fucking queers mate.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love falling out the window with confetti in my hair, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:42, archived)

Badger loves it. He gets drinks bought for him all night
and makes all my gay friends very jealous when he pulls more than they do.
( Wicca'd Witch lives in the country, where the moo-cows poo., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:44, archived)

Heh!
The gays love the skinny men, don't they? :)

/used to get a fair bit of attention from The Gays
(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:48, archived)

I never have.
Perhaps I'm not [insert desirable adjective] enough for anyone.
( Woodsideindustrier Aktiebolag mocking GayBeards™ since, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:53, archived)

[AIDSy]

(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:53, archived)

[DOWNSy]

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:56, archived)

[FATTy]

(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:59, archived)

[DRUGgy]

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 1:02, archived)

[EASy]

(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 1:08, archived)

Prince desperately trying to grab a dirty magazine from a top shelf JUST out of reach.

( Jam Master Geordie The People's Champion of B3ta., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:19, archived)

JUST out of reach, he has trouble reaching the middle shelf.
The dwarfen bastard.
( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:20, archived)

Shhh
he'll sue you for damages.
( Sibod points and laughs at you, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:20, archived)

I was thinking that as I typed.

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:21, archived)

Har!

( Undulating Tentacles of Love falling out the window with confetti in my hair, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:24, archived)

Can they cry.
Do they have tear ducts.
( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:19, archived)

I will pull one apart with my bare hands to find out.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love falling out the window with confetti in my hair, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:23, archived)

In the name of science.

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:25, archived)

that never washes with the authorities :(((((:((:(

( Undulating Tentacles of Love falling out the window with confetti in my hair, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:29, archived)

Show your science card.
That always works, you have got a science card, haven't you.
( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:30, archived)

I have a piece of cardboard with "SCIENCE" written in red crayon on.
will that do?
( Undulating Tentacles of Love falling out the window with confetti in my hair, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:36, archived)

That's the one.
You had me worried for a minute there.
( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:37, archived)

I wear it around my neck.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love falling out the window with confetti in my hair, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:46, archived)

Like a small sex child.

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:58, archived)

they cry their tears of unfathomable sadness in wracked silence

(Boondocks - YEAH! reconsider yourself before you wreck yo self, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:20, archived)

Peur duvs
:(
(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:24, archived)

Why not?

( Mrs Hood Butter Hawkwind stole my coffee!, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:17, archived)

Nobody has realised that this is the correct answer.

( Quim LEAK is Zombie obsessed - http://trioxin.wordpress.com/, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:22, archived)

^this

( parttimedogfish woz ere, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:26, archived)

THAT'S SEXWANG

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:28, archived)

*sigh*
I have no idea, but I'm so very tired of it.
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:18, archived)

Use your ninja skills to kill it

( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:18, archived)

I can't
it doesn't have a face.
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:18, archived)

Ms 'Pots!
I've started ninja school and now am a yellow belt in Flipping Out & Killing People!
(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:20, archived)

Which one?

( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:21, archived)

*flips out*

*kills*
(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:23, archived)

oohh awesome
which stlye?
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:23, archived)

Kara-tay

(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:24, archived)

which form of Kara-tay?

( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:26, archived)

Go-Kan-Ryu
NOT Gok Wan ;)
(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:29, archived)

ohh
I haven't done that one. I do Wado-ryu
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:30, archived)

Like, run Scoob
zoiks!
( Derek Monte yo home to bel air, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:32, archived)

pfft!
why? :o)
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:33, archived)

Nifty
I got to brown and white in Shotokan then realised I was only passing the exams but not getting any better...
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:26, archived)

I'm having a go at it before I send the kids there.
Turns out that I've got a bit of natural ability and enjoy it, so I thought I'd stick at it :)
(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:28, archived)

Enjoy it!
I just got bored and wasn't good at it.
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:29, archived)

When I first started at this place they thought I'd come from a Shotokan club
because I (apparently) held a very low, Shotokan-style stance.
(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:34, archived)

yup
dead give away if you come from Shotokan. My stances a low for Wado-ryu.
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:36, archived)

It's brilliant for kids...utterly fucking brilliant.
Reece really enjoys it (he does Phoenix).

I may start if I shift some weight.
( Wicca'd Witch lives in the country, where the moo-cows poo., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:30, archived)

Yay!
More ninjas on /talk!
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:32, archived)

Do I count as a ninja?

( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:34, archived)

when did you stop training?

( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:35, archived)

About...
6 months ago :(
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:36, archived)

what the fuck!
Get yourself a decent academy and get your 1st Dan!
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:37, archived)

All we did was learnt the kihon, kumite and kata rigourously
No real world stuff, useless for real life.
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:39, archived)

Then you were at a poor club
trufax
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:40, archived)

Probably
I would like to (properly) learn a martial art, but now is not the good time for it...
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:41, archived)

ok
just don't forget it's there whenever you want to go back.
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:42, archived)

Fuck off.
It's all useful, you just need to apply it.
( Wicca'd Witch lives in the country, where the moo-cows poo., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:40, archived)

I know, but my club only taught the exact forms rigidly, so you learnt the theory but were never good at applying it in real life.

( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:43, archived)

Shame
Shotokan was my first style
( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:29, archived)

My dad is a third dan black belt in Shotokan.

( Wicca'd Witch lives in the country, where the moo-cows poo., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:29, archived)

*doesn't spill his pint*

(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:32, archived)

Badger is ever so nice to him ;)

( Wicca'd Witch lives in the country, where the moo-cows poo., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:35, archived)

But Badger is ever so nice anyway!

(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:37, archived)

Don't be fooled by that benign grin...
if you cut him open, he has evil stamped through him like blackpool rock.
( Wicca'd Witch lives in the country, where the moo-cows poo., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:39, archived)

Damn!

( Syncubus Warning: author full of shit [GMT-5], Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:38, archived)

[reading below] I did Judo from age 7 to 13.
Got to around blue belt. That was 20 years ago, though.
(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:43, archived)

It's lovely, I thought.
You have so many choices in it.

It can be an easy throw or a disaster, right up to the end of it. Wrap them up, and you still have the option.

It's nasty, if you decide to be that way with it.
( Syncubus Warning: author full of shit [GMT-5], Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:51, archived)

Hamster style.

( nick the greek I look at your pants and I need a kiss, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:28, archived)

I've studied judo and tai chi.
Judo was through my college, and I wore a yellow belt, since that's what they had available.

I'm a nude in tai chi, if it's dark enough outside or an open minded enough community.
( Syncubus Warning: author full of shit [GMT-5], Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:36, archived)

they're shit

( jenpots red lorry, yellow lorry., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:38, archived)

Judo is a style with a lot of control.
I enjoyed studying it.

Tai chi is something different, but enjoyable.
( Syncubus Warning: author full of shit [GMT-5], Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:44, archived)

'cause you probably kicked it off
as a reflex action.
( Syncubus Warning: author full of shit [GMT-5], Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:20, archived)

Why did I read that as reflection.
Oh yeah because mumbly mumbly mumbly.
( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:29, archived)

Sadist much?
Go for the bollocks..
( B.T., Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:20, archived)

Just that?

( Syncubus Warning: author full of shit [GMT-5], Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:40, archived)

It's that kitten that was linkified a few days back.
AICMFP
( stuj LET DING STAY YOU STUPID HATS!, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:43, archived)

delilah

(Just Harry is the Balls on Chin world champion, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:18, archived)

WHAT?

(Johnny Catfish is tee are oh you beebeebee ell ee, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:18, archived)

WHERE?

( Sibod points and laughs at you, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:20, archived)

You touched your parents as you slept.
And made the priest cry with your foul talk.
( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:20, archived)

Is this the new Sugarbabes single?

( Sibod points and laughs at you, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:21, archived)

You're the new sugababes single.

( Wildheart Baby release the midget sweatshop cellar mexicans, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:23, archived)

you are Annie Lennox
AICMFP
( Derek Monte yo home to bel air, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:21, archived)

She's bloody wonderful.
/fan blog
( Syncubus Warning: author full of shit [GMT-5], Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:22, archived)

and she has
curious dancing eyebrows
( Mushroom, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:25, archived)

Sweet

( Derek Monte yo home to bel air, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:26, archived)

dreams

( Mushroom, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:27, archived)

Haha!

( Syncubus Warning: author full of shit [GMT-5], Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:29, archived)

chicken thigh.

( Syncubus Warning: author full of shit [GMT-5], Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:21, archived)

a. why not
b. because
c. huh?
( Shiksa fuck 'em and feed 'em fish, Sat 5 Jul 2008, 0:41, archived)