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Howdy beeter pardners! I hope you are enjoying your day. Despite an altercation with a prick on ebay about the 'new' Nintendo thing I bought for my kid with a 2in scratch on the lid, I'm ok. Wishing my sportball fan forum chums the best of luck tonight.

Yours,

Richard
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:42, Reply)
Ch ch ch
Wassamatta wit you booooooy?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:47, Reply)
john barnes european soccer on the a500

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:48, Reply)
days of thunder on the a500
clive barker's nightbreed on the a500
pp hammer and his pneumatic weapon on the a500
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:53, Reply)
bet you don't get video game boxes done by the likes of simon bisley and roger dean nowadays

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:58, Reply)
You also don't get boxes
Which are so big a manual and disk can rattle around in them.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:03, Reply)
Your nan's clunge is so big a man's dick can rattle around in it, m8

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:05, Reply)
Having a beartrap for a minge
You probably lost most of your inches on her climax
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:08, Reply)
gbh reissues had the right idea, about 12cm square

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:06, Reply)
#boxtalk

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:12, Reply)
I bet you don't either, you dirty old bollocks

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:03, Reply)
BLOCKED

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:07, Reply)
I had a handheld solar powered 'Breakout' game in a clamshell case 'back in teh day'
I'm pretty sure this makes me an 'old skool gamer'

edit: www.youtube.com/watch?v=px6tgCn9fEU
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:59, Reply)
It makes you something.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:08, Reply)
Fresh and fly?
I *knew* it!
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:10, Reply)
I also had this, it was dope
www.handheldmuseum.com/Entex/SI.htm
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:09, Reply)
Ebay is full of wankers.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:49, Reply)
This item was sold as new
Box wasn't sealed, scratch on top - also instruction booklet in German and Russian only. Chap says he never opened the box to check - might be true, could have bought returned stock from a big retailer and not checked it. TBH if it works I've got a good deal - he's refunded nearly 20% off the price he charged, which was itself pretty good. If it's a refurb I have now only paid maybe a tenner over the market rate for that: and the scratch is pretty light.

If it doesn't work I shall go squinnying to eBay and PayPal who will take my side for sure. Can confirm: have sold on eBay & Amazon and dealt with dodgy liar customers.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:58, Reply)
send a guff in jiffy bag to him

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:59, Reply)
standard

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:02, Reply)
Ebay always side with the buyers. Even when they're wrong
Ebay are cunts and so are most of their users
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:01, Reply)
^^^^^^^^^^^

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:06, Reply)
Doesn't sound like a complete disaster, but "I didn't open and check" is a load of old wank.
And turd is right, you'll get your money back from ebay, but the seller will see no negative impact at all, you won't even be able to leave negative feedback.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:04, Reply)
If it costs me nothing then fuck it, at least I have time to get another one before her birthday

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:06, Reply)
Yeah, that's true.
I can understand ebay protecting their sellers, as without sellers there is no site, but sometimes you want a dick head to get some comeuppance.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:08, Reply)
That's true
I had to get some cunt's feedback removed from Amazon the other day. He had 'cancelled his order' and was furious because we shipped it (he hadn't). Fucking semi-literate bellend. I did enjoy messaging him saying that he seemed 'upset' and needed to 'calm down and stop being so needlessly rude'.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:13, Reply)
^upset and needlessly rude

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:17, Reply)
^needs to calm down

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:19, Reply)
love and kisses
xxx
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:53, Reply)
Good luck Iceland
#b3tasweepstakes
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:58, Reply)
+ 1 'hoo'

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:25, Reply)
Should have paid the prick in pennies.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:02, Reply)

n e
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:07, Reply)
He'll end up with nowt if it's dodge.
Incidentally, he has a Romanian surname #takebackcontrol #deathtodarkies
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:08, Reply)
Typical jews.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:22, Reply)
T-cut will sort the scratch out .
Better still, put a sticker over it. We got a load of drunknmunky decals from the local skate place - no idea what that is, but the kids were quick to slap the stickers all over their stuff.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:21, Reply)
This?
www.ebay.co.uk/itm/T-CUT-SCRATCH-MAGIC-CAR-SCRATCH-REMOVER-MAGIC-PEN-/121388353850

PS thanks for the tip, as long as the fucking thing works I've done well. It was worth opening it up anyway - didn't realise you don't get a charger with them.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:29, Reply)
PPS 'T-Cut Scratch Magic' sounds like a hip hop mixtape

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:31, Reply)
Should have a charging dock with it

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:31, Reply)
not with the new ones apparently
www.polygon.com/2015/1/14/7547465/new-nintendo-3ds-xl-charger-ac-adapter-warranty
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:37, Reply)
light them up mate

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:42, Reply)
imma shank the cunts I swear down

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:43, Reply)
Dunno, rich, I was taking the piss - doesn't t-cut dissolve cars, or something?
Not sure about not getting a charger, though. Does it just charge from a suitable phone doohickey?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:36, Reply)
I can't drive and know literally nothing about them
As for a charge, no idea either but Argos do one for £6.95
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:41, Reply)
That occurred to me after I'd typed.
Rub one on a tube train, see what happens.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:44, Reply)
Last time I 'rubbed one' on a tube train I got 18 months

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:47, Reply)
a-ha!
The internet tells me to buy a cover case for it: less than a tenner on eBay and it'll look perfect.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:46, Reply)
I was gonna gift my turn table to a bloke in the pub, a quick eBay for project debut 1 revealed I was mugging myself off

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:30, Reply)
Bit of an overgenerous gift for a 'bloke in the pub' eh

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:32, Reply)
I assumed it was worth fuck all after all these years

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:33, Reply)
Just looked at how much my Technics are worth....I assumed fuck all either but no, more than I paid for them.
Thanks, hipsters!
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:40, Reply)
What's your take on CD turntables, Mr mcbeef?
Are they as daft as I suspect, or are they genuinely useful?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 17:46, Reply)
Let's be positive
What ISN'T shit and rubbish?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:12, Reply)
International Superstar Soccer Deluxe on the SNES

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:15, Reply)
^^^

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:04, Reply)
lost vikings 2 on the snes

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:17, Reply)
Vikings is also a good series

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:18, Reply)
and Lost Vikings by Dethklok has a great music video

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:19, Reply)
i like the two tracks of theirs that got made into batmetal and batmetal returns

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:47, Reply)
never seen it
there's too much tv nowadays, i can't keep up

did get a vikings branded drinking horn from a lootcrate once though, i'm sure you'll be delighted to hear
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:24, Reply)
I put a NES emulator on the old Wii, at the weekend,
then legitimately acquired a selection of appropriate ROMs for it. The kids are pretty pleased, but I'm once again struck by how terrible old video games are.
Mario (1-3), Mega Man (1-6), Contra, Castlevania (1-3), Bionic Commando, all rubbish. Kirby's Adventure seems alright, though.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:31, Reply)
mario 3 is not rubbish, ma8

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:47, Reply)
Only if your comparing it to Mario 2, manom8.
Seriously, what the hell is going on in Mario 2? It's like they just changed the sprites on a totally different game.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:51, Reply)
i assume you know that that is exactly what they did
maybe it's just nostalgia since i used to play mario 3 every friday in gamley's toy shop in fareham after school/before going to sainsbury's, but it had good level design and ting
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:55, Reply)
I think I read something, somewhere, a while back,
but that was the first time I'd played it. I was amazed at how obvious it was.
The level design in Mario 3 isn't any better or worse than the crap my kids are throwing together in Mario Maker. I'm still slightly taken aback by how many old video games required you to learn what was coming next, in order to beat them, as opposed to being able to react to what was happening on screen - it's very easy to die and feel like it had nothing to do with the player's actions. Still, it's better than Ghouls'n'Ghosts.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:07, Reply)
In Japan, Mario Bros. 2 was a completely different game
called Yume Kj: Doki Doki Panic. It had different sprites but similar levels and mechanics (picking up and throwing things, hidden doors and a more "exploratory" design).
The actual Mario Bros. 2 was later released in the west as The Lost Levels, the story goes that Nintendo didn't want to release Mario Bros. 2 / Lost Levels in America as they thought it would be too hard for Western gamers, so they took a popular but easier Japanese game, added Mario et al into it, and shipped it as Mario Bros. 2.

#factsaboutshitnobodycaresaboutwillyoufuckoffmupps
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:09, Reply)
Wasn't Doki Doki Panic full of gollywogs, too?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:12, Reply)

soooooooort of...
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:14, Reply)
They're just Shyguys, but the dude at the top right of the cage has a penis growing out of his forehead.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:18, Reply)
Common misconception - They would go on to BECOME Shyguys
Did you mean this then?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:26, Reply)
That's the one.
On reflection, it could just be Grover.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:30, Reply)
you ever seen the supper mario broth blog?
mildly interesting stuff if you're a mario fan
www.suppermariobroth.com/
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:34, Reply)
i've often wondered what their surnames are, if it is mario that is just stupid

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:45, Reply)
they go back and forth on the issue
but currently, yeah. they're mario mario and luigi mario
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:51, Reply)
then that is just stupid and i refuse to buy another mario game

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:55, Reply)
fair

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:17, Reply)
I thought Castlevania was still great but what made it hard was the poor controls.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:49, Reply)
Yeah, it's pretty enjoyable, but the way stairs are intangible is ridiculous.
I'll bet Dracula is in violation of some EU Health & Safety regs, what with his failure to put up any banisters.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:53, Reply)
^^^^

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:04, Reply)
all the things I like but not all the things everyone else likes

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:18, Reply)
on the snes

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:18, Reply)
my brother convinced me to club our Christmas money to buy a mega drive
but then all my schoolmates got Sneses and I had no-one to swap games with :(
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:20, Reply)
Well I'm in the Graham's lodge in Porto sipping a glass of 20 year old tawny and it's really rather nice.
Rather annoyed that it's gonna cost me 20p more because of bloody Brexit though.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:18, Reply)
Bragging tax

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:22, Reply)
Well Grrrmachine asked what wasn't rubbish and I'm a grown up with responsibilities so I don't play computer games.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:25, Reply)
The correct answer was Sensible Soccer
Just use that next time
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:31, Reply)
Cannon Fodder m8, get it right ffs

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:36, Reply)
I didn't really like either, if I'm honest.
Likewise, Worms.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:40, Reply)
Civilization?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:41, Reply)
Populous.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:44, Reply)
Yes
Having a go of that later
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:48, Reply)
worms was great in multiplayer
did you just not have any friends? there was one called world party that had language packs from loads of different countries, and i'd play with my uni housemnates from finland, japan and portugal. the worms would swear in the native languages. it was well lol
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:57, Reply)
Not friends with Amigas, no.
That, and no one owned modems back then.
Two people sharing a Spectrum keyboard to play Gauntlet - that's multiplayer.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:01, Reply)
i wasn't aware of it until the pc version
i did have a terrible port on the snes though. each worm was about 2 pixels
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:04, Reply)
Gauntlet (or was it II) 4 player on Amiga was great
Apart from everyone screaming "For fuck sake Dave move left, MOVE LEFT, DAVE WE'RE TRYING TO GET DOWN HERE MOVE LEFT YOU FUCKING TWAT"
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:05, Reply)
I bet Dave would shoot the food, too.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:09, Reply)
Yeah
Bloody twat.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:11, Reply)
^dave

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:09, Reply)
Bit strong mate

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:11, Reply)
^got beaten one too many times at street fighter and ran home crying

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:56, Reply)
I preferred the original Street Fighter to SFII.
Probably because I had no friends.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:14, Reply)
My lovely watch collection

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:20, Reply)
are they like pokemon or sutin?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:24, Reply)
I'll never get a left handed seadweller, only 2 in the world, and I believe one was stolen

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:29, Reply)
"Seadweller! I choose YOU!"
Yep, definitely a Pokémon. You could probably just evolve a Barnaclid.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:46, Reply)
It's Always Sunny in Philidelphia

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:22, Reply)
dunno on that
but philadelphia on a toasted bagel is alright
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:24, Reply)
No it's not, they have rough winters

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:25, Reply)
That is such a Dee thing to say

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:51, Reply)
haha

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:04, Reply)
God Bless You, Mr Rosewater.
I'm only 70 pages in, It's great. If only for snippets like this:

'What he's saying, I think, is that art has failed him, which, I must admit, is a very fair thing for a man who has bayoneted a fourteen-year-old boy in the line of duty to say.'
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:28, Reply)
What an unwieldy sentence

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:13, Reply)
Vonnegut is great like that.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:15, Reply)
I find writing like that quite annoying.
He could at least have thrown a semi-colon in there to show willing.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:32, Reply)
Here is a lesson in creative writing. First rule: Do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college.”

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:43, Reply)
Oddly enough I went to college and did a lot of creative writing.
So there you go. I like a semi-colon; I find them useful. Sounds like reverse snobbery from some ghastly working class type.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:03, Reply)
I quite like them myself; I have a degree.
Vonnegut is great though, and I'll not have you dismiss him based solely on his dislike of the semicolon.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:09, Reply)
I too have a degree and I shall dismiss whomever I care to.
GOOD DAY, SIR.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:10, Reply)
alcohol

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:36, Reply)
Me.
I'm so hot right now.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:38, Reply)
my favourite snes games are starfox, zelda and sim city

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:51, Reply)
+ shaq-fu

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 14:58, Reply)
i had that
it came with a copy of this single youtu.be/H2Jztd_HsPY
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:08, Reply)
shit be ca$h

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:12, Reply)
I've been re-unied with my N64 this weekend with 4 controllers.
Obv Goldeneye and Mario Kart, but what other good 4 player games were there. Bomberman etc
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:00, Reply)
I always enjoyed a good round of "what the fuck is wrong with this controller?".

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:10, Reply)
Mario Golf was always good for laid-back multiplayer.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:11, Reply)
i'd hook it up to a crt telly if you have one
goldeneye is almost unplayable on a flatscreen
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:15, Reply)
I will force it to be 4:3
No stretching
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:16, Reply)
I found unless you have a Scart cable most LCD's can't tune into the signal properly anyway.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:19, Reply)
I had this problem setting up a Dreamcast that someone offloaded to me

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:24, Reply)
rf modulators are shit and drift all over the shop but that didn't matter as the receivers did the same but fine-tuned to account for it.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:40, Reply)
ginger beer

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:08, Reply)
Actual ginger beer, or ginger flavoured carbonated soft drinks?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:15, Reply)
actual ginger beer

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:28, Reply)
putty squad on the 64NES

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:10, Reply)
Super Metroid on the SNES

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:12, Reply)
DMT

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:17, Reply)
TDM, more like!

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:19, Reply)
OH JEEZ

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:26, Reply)
He's filming himself wearing a VR headset, now.
He's such a fucking spanner.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:28, Reply)
on the snes?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:52, Reply)
Up the schnozz more like!


*doesn't actually work nasally
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:55, Reply)
i don't really know what it is, if i'm 100% honest
AND I AM
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:18, Reply)
Desoxymethyltestosterone.
Richard mcBEEFCAKE.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:30, Reply)
Breasts

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:21, Reply)
^ gay

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:23, Reply)
Nah ladies breasts.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:45, Reply)
Ladies are well gay.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:53, Reply)
Fuck all you overly cheerful bastard.
Every fucking post here it's like you're farting rainbows. God I'm sick of your positive attitude.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:22, Reply)

Seinfeld
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:28, Reply)
What's the deal with observational comedy?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:31, Reply)
Worlds colliding Jerry
WORLDS COLLIDING
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:33, Reply)
you lie!

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:41, Reply)
The stand up bits really put me off that.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 15:42, Reply)
Your nan found my standup bit off-putting.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:02, Reply)
You should've used the wire brush like she asked then.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:10, Reply)
He hates mondays but love lasagna, that crazy cat

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 16:16, Reply)
50 Cent gets arrested on St. Kitts in the Carribean for saying the word motherfuckers
when I was but a wee lad with somewhat of an American upbringing my mother regularly washed my mouth out with soap when I used the words fuck, shit, etc.

what circumstances has your potty mouth brought you into?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:59, Reply)
Bit harsh for saying etcetera.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:03, Reply)
#Bretcetera

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:06, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/links/1366942
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:04, Reply)
I got told off for saying 'shitcunt gaylords' in a restaurant only yesterday

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:05, Reply)
did the waiter correct you and say it's called "gayLAIRDS"
since you were at the opening night of a new pro-independence Scottish eatery?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:07, Reply)
It was a pop-up pulled haggis and whisky place in Dalston

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:09, Reply)
Flats and Sharps played a rare bagpipe set

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:10, Reply)
Where as phats and smalls are just ballbags.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:13, Reply)
was it this restaurant?
i.imgur.com/MbPZjK1.jpg
saw that poster over the weekend and thought of you lot
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:19, Reply)
^poster boy for the Gaylord

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:38, Reply)
as if a classy establishment like that would let an oik like me in

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:42, Reply)
I would reply, "Do you want fries with that?"

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:42, Reply)
Someone once gave me a lecture on homophobia for saying gay regarding the weather
I actually said 'gale' the fucking idiot.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:29, Reply)
I got called a misogynist for calling someone a cunt.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:30, Reply)
I don't get that line of thinking.
It's not as if we don't liken people to male anatomy as well.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:33, Reply)
If you really want to upset someone who's a bit dim call someone 'niggardly'.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:32, Reply)
Or a 'retarded coon'

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:35, Reply)
I use it erryday

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:35, Reply)
'blowing a gay(le)' lol

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:34, Reply)
lol

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:36, Reply)
^this^

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:38, Reply)
FTW

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:38, Reply)
thanks for the gold kind stranger!

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:39, Reply)
rip my shitbox (

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:39, Reply)
[job] here. Can confirm

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:41, Reply)
here we go, the old le [job] circlejerk, full of SJWs.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:43, Reply)
i like reddit /finance/ it's full of people who earn between $60,000 to $100,000 a year
telling people they managed to clear $5000 of debt in a month or two
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:44, Reply)
I like the way they all seem to think unfunny expat Midlands shitcock John Oliver is the greatest comedian of all time.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:47, Reply)
He's the greatest. Can confirm.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:48, Reply)
^after that sweet sweet karma

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:49, Reply)
but Jon Stewart is the best
obviously
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:50, Reply)
4 teh upvotes

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:50, Reply)
[x-post from /r/jonstewart/] can confirm: is best

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:51, Reply)
teh

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:39, Reply)
American? How do you feel about brexit

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:33, Reply)
eat shit

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:34, Reply)
my mother once belted me across the face for calling my dad a prick
only I didn't
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:36, Reply)
that doesn't really answer the question, prick

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:36, Reply)
don't make me raise my hand at you

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:39, Reply)
soz mum :(

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:40, Reply)
Was he a prick though?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:40, Reply)
almost certainly, I was a teenager at the time so must've been in the right

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:41, Reply)
now that it's ok to be openly racist, what have you kept to yourself all these years?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:37, Reply)
The Asian family over the road have extremely loud children, and I can't believe they get so many of them in a 2 bed terrace.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:39, Reply)
just go over there and give them a good old fashioned repatriation

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:45, Reply)
Polish cooking really is fucking awful and I don't understand why immigrants bother going to Polski skleps
when they've got pretty much every other flavour available to hand already, and they're all infinitely preferable.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:41, Reply)
There's a few polski skleps on cowley road, they manage to be fairly cheap for standard ingredients.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:41, Reply)
We get bread from the local sklep, occasionally.
Seems alright.
No doubt I won't even been allowed a French stick, in Boris's Britain.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:43, Reply)
Polish bread is fucking great
but only because they don't have to fill it with all the mandated additives you have in the UK
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:46, Reply)
I pick the vitamins out of each slice before I make my sandwiches.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:49, Reply)
"slice"?
fucking hell, I'd forgotten how rank English bread is :(
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:49, Reply)
I make no apologies for owning a bread knife.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:53, Reply)
it's ok mm
I was just remembering the cloying mess that counts as sliced bread over there
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:57, Reply)
The Chorleywood method has a lot to answer for.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:59, Reply)
United "Shitwheat" Kingdom :(

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:01, Reply)
'comin' in yer ear'

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:36, Reply)
there was a guy on the radio who said he'd voted to leave because he was fed up of going to tesco and seeing a polish food section
fair enough really, nobody wants polish food imposed upon them
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:43, Reply)
liz hurley voted leave because she doesn't like energy-saving lightbulbs

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:44, Reply)
I'd like to see celebrities spuriously associated with bizzare claims against the EU

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:46, Reply)
Bob Geldof voted Leave because the fishermen in the Thames voiced credible concerns over their livelihoods
lol
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:47, Reply)
Barry Chuckle voted leave because of the health and safety laws which impacted his career
Paul didn't give a shit.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:52, Reply)
Simon Bodger voted leave because EU food safety standards prevented the sale of cheap instant mash.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:54, Reply)
Pat Sharp voted leave due to restrictive laws on the length his mullet could be

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:40, Reply)
Debbie McGee voted Leave because the EU has sanctioned the voodoo practices she needs to resurrect Paul

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:53, Reply)
No, she voted remain, because it makes freedom of movement so much easier.
For Alasatians.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:41, Reply)
David Blunkett voted Leave because he knows his dog is black, even though the EU keeps telling him it isn't

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:55, Reply)
Neil Buchanan voted leave because of the tortuous laws relating to crafting glue.
He also hates the jews.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:02, Reply)
Huw Edwards voted Leave just so he'd have something interesting to talk about on the news

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:06, Reply)
nor do i, perhaps she'll allow me to fuck her tits

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:49, Reply)
haha, if you ask as formally as that, i don't see how she could refuse

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:57, Reply)
Scientists have recently found a way to make incandescents that are more efficient than cfl/LED's.
No doubt with EU grants.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:58, Reply)
yeah that isn't what i asked, and also it was mit who have been working on it, doubt the eu gave money to a top american university, but i bow down to your knowledge as i find it is quicker in the long run

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:02, Reply)
cheers.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:05, Reply)
He should run a campaign to get potatoes, lemons and tomatoes out of supermarkets.
Native British food, for native Britons! Turnips for all!
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:47, Reply)
hackshually *adjusts glasses*
The turnip, although cultivated and eaten worldwide, was actually grown for farming and agricultural purposes in ancient India, stretching across to Greece and even some parts of Roman Italy, and spread to our shores through the expansion of the Roman Empire
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:57, Reply)
No wonder we were so keen to have an empire.
There's nothing to eat, here.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:04, Reply)
And still I stand by that point

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:49, Reply)
I like it when people complain about them being there as if they're preventing the space from being used for something else.
Which given they're usually the only shop on the street that isn't empty or a bookies, suggests otherwise.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:53, Reply)
I cook bigos occasionally. I like it.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:50, Reply)

+t
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:51, Reply)
was it not before then? oops

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:45, Reply)
can we just get some clarity on who it is ok to hate now?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:48, Reply)
anyone over 65, regardless of whether they've spent their entire working life paying into the EU
according to every prick under 25.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:51, Reply)
my love for you

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:50, Reply)
Chinese takeaway is terrible
Compared to the real food. There, I said it.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:53, Reply)
Pizza is overrated.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:55, Reply)
A good pizza these days is hard to find

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:12, Reply)
Stuffed crust, the cheesy kind.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:14, Reply)
so please be gentle on the moped ride

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:16, Reply)
look at this fucking thing
money.cnn.com/2016/06/15/technology/runcible-phone/index.html?iid=ob_homepage_tech_pool

what else is utter bullshit for cunts? you can and should say b3ta
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:34, Reply)
anti-aging cream
I've been using it to wank with for years but my cock still looks like Compo
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:37, Reply)
well yeah, but the rest of you looks like compo too so hardly surprising

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:39, Reply)
I've already got a phone for people who hate phones,
it's called a nothing at all, and it was completely free
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:37, Reply)

?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:39, Reply)
got one

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:42, Reply)
it looks like it would skim quite nicely across a lake

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:49, Reply)
Lootcrates

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:51, Reply)
you've got to be a real eczma-ridden livealone dweeb to have one of those delivered every month
it's like home delivery for people so socially awkward they don't even feel welcome in a Games Workshop.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:53, Reply)
you've clearly put a lot of work into this post
would you like some reddit gold?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:20, Reply)
no thanks, I've already got some

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:26, Reply)
well whores will have their trinkets

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:27, Reply)
yeah, gold
which is better than a Malifaux poster and some manky t-shirt even a Steam sale couldn't shift.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:28, Reply)
what does that describe?
i had to google malifaux as i've never heard of it. it doesn't seem to be anything to do with lootcrate. have you ever seen one?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:30, Reply)
Are they actually any good?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:32, Reply)
depends what you like. i have a bookcase at home and a shelf at work covered in little figures and that
and an extensive amount of tshirts. so getting more of those things based on franchises i like gives me a small reason to be cheerful once a month. it's quite an extravagance but i don't mind. often there's at least one naff thing in each box (this month had, and i promise this isn't a joke, a matrix jigsaw puzzle!) but on the whole, they're good fun
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:36, Reply)
one of the dorkier programmers gets one delivered to the office
He was trying to promote those Malifaux things to us all as "no really it's not Warhammer"
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:36, Reply)
those miniature wargame things seem like a really expensive hobby

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:22, Reply)
very much so
but it seems pretty much every hobby is really expensive if you let it.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:29, Reply)
also:
"reddit gold is our premium membership program. It grants you access to extra features to improve your reddit experience. it also makes you really quite dapper"
sounds like utter bullshit for cunts to me. i don't know for sure though so i'll not make several posts decrying it
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:33, Reply)
you'e really bitten hard on this lootcrate stuff manolith
you need to calm down a bit
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:35, Reply)
*ticks 'accuse the other person of being upset' off i-spy book of internet arguing list*

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:22, Reply)
did you get that list in your lootcrate?
or just make it yourself?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:28, Reply)
it's a fictional list
but i could probably sell it to some publisher as a shitty coffee table book
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:35, Reply)
well, i'll probably have to cancel mine now that the prices will inevitably go up

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:20, Reply)
b3ta
#b3xit
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:56, Reply)
thanks hotfuck belmington, i'm glad someone listens to me

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:21, Reply)
Adult colouring books

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:07, Reply)
Unless it is the Modern Toss one
Sent as a piss take.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:21, Reply)
i'd say if you've decided that colouring in is something you want to spend more time doing
you might as well have a fun pingu one rather than just endless wanky shapes?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:23, Reply)
Yarn bombing

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:07, Reply)
is that the thing where people knit round trees, etc?
there was a lamppost in southsea that was covered in wool for ages. i think someone set it on fire, eventually
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:22, Reply)
Roller derby

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:08, Reply)
I dunno
Women fighting is pretty sexy
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:21, Reply)
i've seen videos of it as a friend's wife wanted to take it up
but it just seemed to consist of skating round and round in circles looking aggressive
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:24, Reply)
My brother is covered in bruises,
and spends much of his time touching the boobs of angry women.

He also plays Roller Derby, haha!
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:11, Reply)
haiyo!

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:24, Reply)
Sleeve tattoos

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:08, Reply)
all tattoos, unless you are a sailor or a convict

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:09, Reply)
Writing your babymama's name on your knee in biro is well grown up

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:27, Reply)
Sleeve/hopelessly predictable tattoos are a good indicator of morons though.
They save the state an expensive branding programme.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:18, Reply)
yeah, getting tattoos on your clothes is a bit silly

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:24, Reply)
Isn't that just drawing on them in indelible ink?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:49, Reply)
Kilts

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:08, Reply)
ok, you've got too many to keep replying to individually
i will warn you that you could be straying into proto-grrrmachine territory and nobody wants to see your life go that far wrong. we care about you, windy
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:25, Reply)
at least I don't have the whimsical side of my personality
delivered to my door once a month for a subscription fee
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:27, Reply)
what point are you trying to make here?
should i be ashamed of the fact that i like getting surprise stuff in the mail?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:28, Reply)
and should Windy be ashamed that he doesn't like aspects of modern life?
you need to get ahold of this bullying mano, you're tearing this forum apart
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:37, Reply)
Youre right. I'll stop. Sorry mate.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:30, Reply)
Adele

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:08, Reply)
Glastonbury

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:08, Reply)
Beck was great yesterday
But it was like a long list of performers who's voices are shot, such as Ronnie Spector
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:23, Reply)
i like beck
shame he's a bit of a prick
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:27, Reply)
I'm not sure it matters, loads of musicians are pricks but I enjoy their music.
It's where tangles has gone wrong, because he's lovely but his music is for pricks.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:30, Reply)
the long-delayed 2nd album is nearly complete and is sounding lovely

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:34, Reply)
I'm assuming the people who bought the first atrocity get a free copy if this as an apology

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:38, Reply)
Do you apologize for punching someone in the face by kicking them in the balls?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:50, Reply)
y

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:36, Reply)
oh absolutely
scientology is the kind of prickery that hurts other people though, unfortunately
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:24, Reply)
I used to think my greatest 'it's a shame they're a Scientologist' case was Jason Lee.
But now I've grown up a bit and find Kevin Smith films cringey as fuck I don't care very much.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:27, Reply)
i know what you mean
i still have fond memories of watching clerks and mallrats but i'm not going to ruin them by actually watching them again

kevin smith is an entry level geek hero, i'd say. like spiderman
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:29, Reply)
Isn't the angry father in Clerks also the bad guy in Walking Dead?
If so, would he rather cut off his own hand rather than suck the chocolate off those pretzels again?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:35, Reply)
it was the mall security guard in mallrats, but yes
maybe that's he he could stand to cut it off
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:36, Reply)
he he indeed!

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:49, Reply)
Top knots

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:08, Reply)
you could cover most of these by simply saying 'mcbeef'

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:09, Reply)
oh god oh limited edition fucking trainers with a price tag only middle management could afford
for fuck's sake
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:11, Reply)
+ with matching socks
I'm not sure it gets any more bent than that
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:11, Reply)
Flash mobs

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:10, Reply)
hey guys
i've been a bit busy recently, is everything ok? did i miss anything?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:11, Reply)
yes you missed updating everyone on the current situation in the doveston cup

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:12, Reply)
as it stands
Position	        Country	                No.	User
Out (Group Stage, 3rd) Albania 14 tangledupinblue
Out (Group Stage, 4th) Austria 22 manolith
TBC Belgium 19 Sir Sand GOBLIN
Out (Round of 16) Croatia 9 2 Can Chunder
Out (Group Stage, 4th) Czech Republic 2 The Doveston
TBC England 24 monster munch
TBC France 13 broadsword
TBC Germany 20 MONO!
Out (Round of 16) Hungary 1 Mr. Tea
TBC Iceland 15 Major Turd
TBC Italy 8 mongychops
Out (Round of 16) Northern Ireland 3 Gormo
TBC Poland 16 Moon Girl Technologies
TBC Portugal 12 Windy Pig
Out (Round of 16) Republic of Ireland 21 Reverend Fister
Out (Group Stage, 4th) Romania 10 Richard mcbeef
Out (Group Stage, 4th) Russia 18 spanishfly
Out (Round of 16) Slovakia 4 wimbley
TBC Spain 23 artifus
Out (Group Stage, 4th) Sweden 6 Smash Monkey
Out (Round of 16) Switzerland 11 Two Hats
Out (Group Stage, 3rd) Turkey 5 brian clough's pitchside guffs
Out (Group Stage, 4th) Ukraine 17 Grrrmachine
TBC Wales 7 SS

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:24, Reply)
I see it's mostly ex-Soviet states that are already out
that's clearly some form of discrimination
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:29, Reply)
aside from iceland, every country remaining is a member of the eu
this can only point to eu/uefa collaborative corruption
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:37, Reply)
nah

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:27, Reply)
why haven't you invoked article 50 yet?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:29, Reply)
career suicide, innit

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:25, Reply)
Silent disco

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:12, Reply)
Radio 2

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:13, Reply)
Carpet tiles

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:13, Reply)
Facebook

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:13, Reply)
I could do with one of these. It'd make trips to restaurants far less confrontational.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:16, Reply)
Spreadable butter

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:17, Reply)
Because it invariably isn't?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:18, Reply)
Windy Pig

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:18, Reply)
Forum moderation

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:19, Reply)
^

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:27, Reply)
Folk music

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:19, Reply)
Hold on there Windy.
European folk travelled over to America and basically shaped music as we know it; due to segregation it forked off and essentially one group of people gave you everything from Chuck Berry to Chuck D, and the other group gave you Billy Ray Cyrus.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:22, Reply)
Still shit though.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:28, Reply)
Wet wipes

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:20, Reply)
wet wipes are well handy when fishing , i wonder who will make the never before done strikethrough this time

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:03, Reply)

wet rachels
+because they always take the bait
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:12, Reply)
even after a messy meal?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:27, Reply)
Model airplanes

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:21, Reply)
Simon Munnery

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:21, Reply)
^^^^

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:18, Reply)
Simon's are usually pricks really.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:19, Reply)
crikey, what's he done?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:35, Reply)
Cats

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:21, Reply)
Come dine with me.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:21, Reply)
ok, I think I'm free on Friday

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:33, Reply)
90% of stand-up comedy

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:38, Reply)
I can thoroughly recommend the Gong Show at the Comedy Store
For a good old session of telling people they are shite.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:42, Reply)
Awooga. What a rush. Right. Yeah, I got my notes here just in case I completely forget what I'm fucking saying. So, how are we all? Are we all good? Excellent, excellent.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:43, Reply)
I'm an x from y, here is a pithy line about that
Whats up with hat thing which is kinda specific to my social circle that would work in London but people in Gloucester wouldn't get.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:47, Reply)
:(((((((((((((((((((

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:37, Reply)
Still beats 'sitting on a stool with a guitar' comedy.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:46, Reply)
depends where on the Bristol Scale the stool is, I suppose

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:52, Reply)
The water was too dark to tell on the one I just did, but it felt like a 6 coming out.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:00, Reply)
communism

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:07, Reply)
the thing people often forget about Communism
is that, to make it work, you have to not be a complete and utter cunt
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:14, Reply)
^

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:15, Reply)
I'd implement a healthy campaign of gassing any and all dissenters.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:20, Reply)
you'll find that hard, once there's an import tax on sprouts

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:22, Reply)
I'll harness the power of mcbeef's anus.
I reckon he'd be proud to have his guffs used to such ends.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:23, Reply)
Isn't he marrying an immigrant?
It'll be off to the camps for both
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:30, Reply)
They'll probably keep him alive and hook his bum up to a gas silo.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:33, Reply)
His choice of an antipodean bride is the manifestation of his distaste for the EU and love for Eurovision.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:33, Reply)
Genuine innovation in the smartphone sector is hard to find.
A phone that doesn't actually work could be a revelation.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:21, Reply)
Alright Fergal Sharkey, stop trying to update your 80s classic hit to appeal to the youth market

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:33, Reply)
A GOOD PHONE!

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:36, Reply)
The ringing kind

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:37, Reply)
Thanks for the earworm.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 12:41, Reply)
welcs

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 13:02, Reply)
morning

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 6:53, Reply)
morning

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 6:58, Reply)
alright Richard McBeef
how did your pasta-making turn out?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:07, Reply)
Really very good indeed thanks
Made ricotta yesterday as well, which was also a great success. Then made spinach and ricotta tortellini. Which was a fucking disaster.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:23, Reply)
Was that because of drinking?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:24, Reply)
Nah. The filling was ace, the pasta itself was fine but make the tortellini themselves is a bit fiddly.
The cunt on YouTube made it look like a piece of piss, but if you don't seal them properly they're fucked.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:28, Reply)
1) cut pasta sheet into squares
2) spoon a small dollop of ricotta onto the centre of each square
3) fold each square over
4) ooooh, kiss each one with a rose on the grey
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:31, Reply)
You make them from circles of pasta ma8
PS a rose on the what?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:32, Reply)
soz, I'm writing docs for a yank audience today

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:33, Reply)
FOR SHAME
#brexit
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:34, Reply)
hey, I work for a Swiss firm, they're not EU and they're properly minted
Britain could do it too if Gordon Brown hadn't sold off all the gold
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:36, Reply)
Should have made tortelloni instead, they're bigger

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:31, Reply)
Little Ears, m8
easteuropeanfood.about.com/od/uszka/r/uszka1.htm
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:32, Reply)
No m8

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:33, Reply)
your loss
Who could resist a bowl of hot sour beetroot soup with a handful of mushroom-filled pastry dumplings slowly dissolving into a goopy mush?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:41, Reply)
I'll just have to learn how to deal with the disappointment at missing out

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:42, Reply)
leave an angry comment on the video
something about his mother and maybe question his sexuality. That should show him.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:31, Reply)
Great idea, I'll feel much better after that

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:33, Reply)
Why wouldn't you fill your pasta with meat, like other men?
Spinach and ricotta is for birds and woofters.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:55, Reply)
^ loves a meaty tube

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:55, Reply)
^ tggi
especially when they're sold as "meat", without even identifying the animal
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:57, Reply)
Once it's been cooked grey, who cares where it came from?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:59, Reply)
Morning all

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:07, Reply)
Good morning H.B.Mupps
what does the B stand for?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:12, Reply)
Not sure, I got this name from a bit of grafitti I saw on a wall
Lets go with Belmington
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:15, Reply)
And the H?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:17, Reply)
Hotfuck

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:38, Reply)
^ going with this ^

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:42, Reply)
a nod to steps

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:22, Reply)
Post-brexit Britain deserves a British morning thread, not this European imitation.
Sign my petition to force The Doveston to get back to work.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:09, Reply)
You haven't Brexited yet
then you can have the bacon-egg-and-toast morning thread instead of this croissant and jam nonsense
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:13, Reply)
Brexit in bed.
Full English Brexit.
Oh, man - what pun thread potential this has!

Continental brexit!
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:49, Reply)
Things hot up with Ready Brexit!

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:57, Reply)
Weetabrexit: if you know what's good for you, OK?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:53, Reply)
Is the Doveston David Cambot?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:16, Reply)

bot girl
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:03, Reply)
Good morning ball bags

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:16, Reply)
imma disassemble my washing machine and spread it all over the lawn

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:23, Reply)
I'm sure you'll fix it.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:14, Reply)
I disassembled your nan's legs and spread them all over the lawn last Christmas

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:04, Reply)
morning grrrmachine

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:17, Reply)
alright spanishfly
What job do you have that requires you to travel up and down the country staying in Travel Taverns?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:23, Reply)

cdn.mos.cms.futurecdn.net/8e8415a4bd3307d3b0bec466acc85ae8-650-80.jpg
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:22, Reply)
god I hate that prick

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:25, Reply)
Alright

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:40, Reply)
shove a lamppost up your dickhole, you prick

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:42, Reply)
OK, done that. Now what?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:44, Reply)
swap it to an LED bulb to help save the planet, you hateful fucknugget

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:49, Reply)
This 5 a day healthy living scaremongering is getting ridiculous now

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 7:50, Reply)
morning

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:02, Reply)
morning MONO

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:03, Reply)
alright?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:06, Reply)
nah mate
my back injury seems to be a trapped nerve in my hip, it's fucking killing me. You?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:09, Reply)
nah mate
everyone's a cunt
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:14, Reply)
surely not EVERYONE?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:22, Reply)
yeah, everyone
even you and me
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:27, Reply)
but surely there's a kindergarten teacher or an animal rescue vet or a little old lady making cream cakes
who isn't a complete cunt?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:29, Reply)
nope

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:35, Reply)
+ you fucking yank cunt

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:36, Reply)
Alright grrry

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:13, Reply)
alright mmps
whatchoo up to?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:22, Reply)
Going to work so I can spend all day in the toilet using the phone.
You?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:34, Reply)
telling each of my bosses I'm busy working for the others
then wanking myself like an EU-subsidised dairy farm
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:52, Reply)
Ah the new auto trader mag must be out.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:27, Reply)
Practical Classics m8

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:30, Reply)
Phwoar!

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:34, Reply)
grreat morning

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:25, Reply)
it is a good day to be British

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:25, Reply)
It really fucking isn't.
I think I might have to undergo a total news blackout for the next six months, lest my blood pressure be raised beyond safe levels and I suffer a massive stroke whilst listening to Today.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:57, Reply)
why, what's got your goat em-em?

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:58, Reply)
Moving to Scotland has gone from silly joke to actual possibility.
Yelling at the radio, this morning, at the silly people who voted out as a "protest vote" but don't actually want to leave.
Boris Johnson.
The Labour Party slowly devouring itself (under other circumstances, I'd probably enjoy watching that happen).
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:00, Reply)
That's just post break up nerves from people, it happens, they'll get over it

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:06, Reply)
Thing is, mongy, you might have allied yourself with small-minded racists,
but look at the bullshit I've hitched myself to. Argh!
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:09, Reply)
oh God, every single person pictured there has made me want to join forces with the pro-leavers

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:34, Reply)
^ tggi
Political disenfranchisement must be blissful.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:36, Reply)
I had no allies, I was asked to vote on my opinion, if others disagreed I wasn't bothered as It was my opinion

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:36, Reply)
Yeah, but you seem less than pleased at being lumped in with the stupid and the racist,
as identified by the Remain camp.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:39, Reply)
Well yeah I don't think calling 18 million people thick racists is the way to go, but I won't cry about it, it just seems very childish

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:42, Reply)
I've long considered my fellow countrymen to be ignorant racists.
The bitter Remainers are just jumping on my bandwagon.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:53, Reply)
If this referendum has proved anything
it's that 18million people don't give a fuck what you think
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:32, Reply)
just remember that all the talking heads and voxpops are just easy filler because the media haven't done their homework
and because it panders to the negative outlook that sells newspapers. No-one wants to hear good news.

The Labour party dissolving can only be a good thing, as they haven't been a working class party since Neil Kinnock's leadership and they deserve to fail.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:07, Reply)
Labour are long overdue a split of some sort, followed by some years in the wilderness.
Trouble is, this will let the Tories govern unopposed. Time for a LidDem resurgence?

*Deep breaths*
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:13, Reply)
BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHA
LibDems are dead, completely dead. Labour have been on life support since Blair's war. UKIP are the only party that have any connect with the unwashed masses, and the nationalists (Plaid, SNP) are the social side, and therefore voiceless in England.

Green are the only party with even the slightest hope of capitalising from all this. But I think the UK just got a fat dose of democracy and realised that it really doesn't like it all that much.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:17, Reply)
I've never liked democracy, Grrry.
I'm just to lazy to raise an army and stage my own coup.

I was joking about the LibDems, by the way. Tim Farron seems like a nice chap, but he's wasting his time.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:21, Reply)
Nick Clegg seemed like a nice chap
but look at the way he strapped on a sandpaper dildo and fucked the student voters up the arse in 2010.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:23, Reply)
Our political system has no room for people who believe in anything other than their own self interest.

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:26, Reply)
well yeah
that's the whole point of democracy. "My vote is for me"
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:30, Reply)
i don't think that's really the case,
in fact i read a very detailed paper a while ago debunking it. The problem isn't that voters don't care about other people, it's just that they don't know about them. I had a very interesting conversation with my gran at the weekend. She seems to have no idea whatsoever what impact the result will have on the lives of EU or non-EU migrants, and wouldn't believe me when i told her. She didn't even know about the £35k minimum salary requirement recently introduced, thought i was making it up.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:54, Reply)
we need a Stalinist purge
that will sort this country out
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:19, Reply)
once you get the NHS cutbacks you so sorely need
then the old will start dying like flies, and since they're the self-serving brexit voters, their death will swing the majority opinion towards a more socially inclusive ideal. Give it ten years.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:21, Reply)
The NHS will be cut back beyond recovery by the Tory right.
Only the OAPs, with their "triple-locked" pensions will have the funds to spare for private healthcare.
The best we can hope for is a summer heatwave, followed by a hard winter, ahead of the next general election.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:30, Reply)
lots of pensioners have bungalows near the coast
so rising sea levels will help your cause a bit too
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:31, Reply)
I'll give you a real world situation now
A person I know had a proposed contract to continue heart research in Swansea is now off as it was party based on EU grant money that made sure the person had a permanent position past 2019 to continue in a teaching capacity is now not happening.

A new building that Swansea proposed to house world class labs is now looking dead as the key tenants have pulled out over the weekend due to the vote.

Wales has set itself back by 20 years in scientific research overnight. I dread to think what other horror stories will surface.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:15, Reply)
So what? The tenants would always have moved on to the area with the cheapest resources
since that's the core principle of the EU. I watched my local island go from fucked to annihilated when Pfizer decided to shut its Sandwich centre, simply because it wanted to relocate those jobs to the continent.

Remember, every penny the UK received from EU grants effectively came from the UK coffers in the first place. If withdrawl of those grants affects jobs or local economies, then there's no reason to believe Westminster won't make those funds immediately available.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:24, Reply)
there's plenty of reason,
Westminster could already choose to fund the regions, the EU never stopped them, but they'd rather keep the money in London.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:30, Reply)
With the forthcoming recession
Along with finance companies moving jobs away from London, the money will never make it to the regions whilst it is used to prop up the cash cow.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:33, Reply)
If you get a general election this year
you can fully expect LibDem and Labour to campaign strongly on "we'll maintain your funding at EU levels", as it's their only way to get elected.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:34, Reply)
yeah they still won't win though,
because the Tories will blame fucking wasps or something, and the thick shitheads will fall for it.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:37, Reply)
yeah, we can agree on that

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:38, Reply)
Even if they do replace the funding (which is highly doubtful due to the fact it looks like Leave people had no idea what the EU was funding)
By the time that is sorted out numerous scientists will have retrained for a different vocation because their contracts are up.

The paralysis has kicked in with funding and it will only get worse.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:32, Reply)
with this sort of bleak impractical perspective
I'm quite glad your vote counts for nothing towards the future of that country
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:38, Reply)
Thanks for your pithy response
I'm sure scientists across the land will take comfort in your words whilst they retrain.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:49, Reply)
you are being ludicrous
you think a PhD course will take less time than sorting out the redistribution of the UK's old EU contributions?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:55, Reply)
Funding decisions turned down today will take 12-18 months to rework
Nobody will guarantee the EU funding till the election, so add a few more months of uncertainty.

In that time, the brain drain will happen.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 11:20, Reply)
the majority is already so slight,
that by the end of the two years it'll take to negotiate exit, enough old people will have died to swing the result the other way.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:24, Reply)
We're still shit.
I hope this helps xxx
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:30, Reply)
I rely on the consistent shitness of /talk.
Thanks, mmps.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:33, Reply)
Scotland is even shitter than /talk
We are QOTW.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:36, Reply)
Scotland is a socialist paradise,
and my wife is banking on her ancestry as a way for our kids to get passports, once the UK splits.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:40, Reply)
it's a socialist paradise because all the money comes from elsewhere, you spastic
Scotland's got a negative economy, thanks to the complete collapse of oil prices and the Scottish idiocy of giving kids free degrees so that they can all fuck off to London once they graduate.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:47, Reply)
Not unaware of this.
Fingers crossed it can soak up all the EU money that used to go to the likes of Cornwall and Wales.

At least I'll be on the winning side when they EU army is raised and conquers England. That's a real thing, right, and not some fevered Brexiteer fantasy?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:52, Reply)
Well, Article 42 of the Lisbon Treaty calls for a common defence
and Frontex is completely staffed by military personal from all EU countries, so I do fully expect an EU army in the near future.

Thing is, EU trade has been shrinking year on year. The UK contributes more than it receives in rebates/subsidies. So as long as the original contribution funding is simply handed to Cornwall and the farmers directly, nothing will change for the poor and the UK saves a billion or so a year. British consumption of EU goods is too high to kick the UK out of the EEC, so imports and exports won't really be affected, and you'll now be able to buy shit Russian products too without EU sanctions.

I don't see what all the fuss is about. The issue is whether or not the UK still has a Tory government or not, and in that way it was ultrafucked well before Brexit.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:58, Reply)
it was mostly the UK that pushed the EU for sanctions against Russia

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:27, Reply)
to make their exports cheaper in the long run, obvs
Seems like a sound political strategy that's paid off well.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:31, Reply)
wat

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:34, Reply)
yeah, push for sanctions to cripple Russia's economy
then leave the area enforcing sanctions so that you can gobble up all Russia's exports on the cheap. Good planning, that.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:35, Reply)
piss off

p.s. :)
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:39, Reply)
depends if London's financial sector don't all relocate to Edinburgh

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:25, Reply)
surely they'd be more likely to move to a country where it's easier to learn the language

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:28, Reply)
or London calls an independence referendum, too

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:35, Reply)
oh hi

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:28, Reply)
oh hey tangled
glad you could make it
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:31, Reply)
oh I wouldn't have missed this for the world

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:38, Reply)
it's be well lol once manolith and Two Hats disentangle themselves from eachother's arms
and log in a few minutes apart to maintain the pretense that they're not in a gay love tryst.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:46, Reply)
that's so hot

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:48, Reply)
No-one is fooled

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:48, Reply)
sorry, only just seen this
^intensely jel
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:07, Reply)
I'm genuinely happy for you both
I don't want your love to hide in the shadows
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:16, Reply)
hello grrr

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:51, Reply)
wotcha mongy
reckon we've got a chance this war? I've done my bit
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:53, Reply)
Dunno, I can't do my op but will send in dragons and see if I can nick a star

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:55, Reply)
yeah, I had a go on yours and got mullered
cunt dragons
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 8:57, Reply)
I just looked, we will be lucky to win this, looks like a loss as our top players have struggled

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:00, Reply)
yup

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:05, Reply)
alright manolith, sleep well?
wink wink nudge nudge
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:10, Reply)
no, but not for any fun reasons

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:38, Reply)
owl related attack I bet

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:47, Reply)
*points at nose, points at you*
this thread's a bit unwieldy now. i hope someone starts a new one soon
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:49, Reply)
because Two Hats needs to spend a few nights with his wife
and you spent the early hours of this morning crying into the hollow dent his body left in your mattress?
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:09, Reply)
eagles, eagles, eagles

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:10, Reply)
sure, why not

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 10:28, Reply)
Morning comrade, what with it being Industrial Workers of the World Day

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:06, Reply)
well met, tovarzish

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:08, Reply)
The bird has left the nest
*nods*
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:36, Reply)
you said it m8
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/bf/Pyramid_of_Capitalist_System.png
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:16, Reply)
I can't tell what end of the shit pipe I'm at :/

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 9:36, Reply)
Eveninh

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 23:49, Reply)
alright ssg
monday will be shit when business, but this time as unusual, starts again for a lot of people.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 0:08, Reply)
Yeh

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 0:11, Reply)
hey ssg - what do you get when you miss type a g for an h?
a hit!
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 1:26, Reply)
Bit harsh

(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 1:48, Reply)
What do you think about the front page of this site? Seems very politically biased? Or they are just the mods opinions? Magic donkey? Where the fuck are the kittens!

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:26, Reply)
very bloo bloo
I blame HappyToast
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:34, Reply)
THE BOSS IS A CUNT

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:57, Reply)
He's put out a lot of crap but born to run was a solid album

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:17, Reply)
cafepress here we come

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:19, Reply)
Don't blame me
I haven't been here for almost a decade.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 0:12, Reply)
I think 99% of the pictures produced on this site come from the minds of depressed middle-aged men
whose lives are just too comfortable for them to have a decent mid-life crisis just yet; besides, the crippling self-doubt about their own looks means it's unlikely the fit young secretary would ever be interested in a fling with them anyway.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:34, Reply)
I'd stop thinking if I was you that sounds deranged and rambling

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:40, Reply)
In his head
He's a badass dude
Shows the light and tells the truth
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:07, Reply)
Definitely projection going on there I reckon.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:32, Reply)
something about the demographics,
try links, see what you think of that
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:35, Reply)
So its the mods being like it, well thanks mods, you've turned the site from the offensive and obscure and fluffy to your political bias, well done

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:43, Reply)
go for it mongy - divide and conquer - its us vs th3m

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:45, Reply)
I just find it odd, the sites always been political, and corbyn has copped it, but ffs where is the funny or floof

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:48, Reply)

gfycat.com/CostlyDimpledEgg
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:51, Reply)

lulz all round
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:54, Reply)
well it is a "peurile digital arts forum",
it's bound to attract a certain sort
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:02, Reply)
^ the self awareness is strong with this one

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:04, Reply)
So the mods are and always were cunts, thanks

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:47, Reply)
you're just annoyed most people here are strongly Remain

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:54, Reply)
Eh, I just upset at the lack of floof on the fp

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:05, Reply)
it's because there's a political event going on that people care about quite a lot,
don't know if you noticed. it'll be a while before this all blows over.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:06, Reply)
So the mods are and always were cunts, ffs I said that, floof

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:22, Reply)

i.imgur.com/Uz2Y9o0.gif
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:26, Reply)
I can't remember the last time I saw the front page of this website.
Has the "weblog" column improved, at all, or is it still just links to the newsletter?
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:36, Reply)
I knew I should have provided a link, sorry

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:38, Reply)
A Polish migrant could run a better thread than this.
(I hope everyone appreciates this topical satire)
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:43, Reply)
Oh would they now? On this wage?I fucking doubt it

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:49, Reply)
It's only a matter of time before /talk is outsourced to India.
Burdy num-num.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:53, Reply)
I think india is full, but I don't mind going, I like curry and chips ... eh rip

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:58, Reply)
I just looked at the FP. There's a link to something about Kunt And The Gang.
I'm not making this up.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:49, Reply)
are they not funny any more I can't keep up oh yeah they never were

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:59, Reply)
We could all just talk about our health problems and the nommy sammidjes and cake we had for lunch if you'd prefer that.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:12, Reply)
I had a dry sponge cake which made me choke.
That made me angry so I took it out on my girlfriend.
She left me and now I'm all alone with a dry sponge cake.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:19, Reply)
Alright mozza

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:41, Reply)
fuck it and eat it

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:25, Reply)
It can be as biased as it likes, it's not the BBC

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:19, Reply)
yeah it's basically the personal website of a middle-class metropolitan liberal
what else should we expect
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:28, Reply)
Floof, ffs, kittens and funny, not unfunny, it's not the spectator

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:42, Reply)
I hate it when free stuff i dont have to be a part of isnt to my taste

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:40, Reply)
If a free local newspaper changes complete editorial direction from floof I do complain, maybe I shouldn't, let the powerful decide

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 23:23, Reply)
there's always been politilols stuff on the front page from time to time

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 23:25, Reply)
Yes as I said, but this is constantly, no jokes or floof, just what it's become, because the mods are cunts

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 23:30, Reply)
since how long ago?
i don't usually bother to look at the FP tbh
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 23:36, Reply)
Yeh complain if its something important sure

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 23:48, Reply)
He still finds gay jokes funny tho, remember that.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:50, Reply)
They should have more jedis knocking shit over, that's well lol that is.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:47, Reply)
You've made me lol just thinking about it

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 21:49, Reply)
Nearly as lol as John Travolta walking around various locations looking confused.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:25, Reply)
I tried cooking a Coq Au Van.
Worked alright.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:42, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/board/11202574
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 22:46, Reply)
ELO
Quality. What was the first record you remember buying?
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:19, Reply)
never bought vinyl

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:21, Reply)
me neither,
never had my own record player, i only got tapes and then CDs
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:23, Reply)
So, that's what I call music 5 then.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:23, Reply)
10 on tape,
my dad bought 9 on vinyl though
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:25, Reply)
got hits 3 and now that's... 3 double lps on the same birthday one year

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:31, Reply)
no that was the name of the band, it's quite obscure, you probably haven't heard of them

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:25, Reply)
My first vinyl was a mayhem/morbid split lp.
Found it in a second hand shop on a school trip to Prague.
I'd bought loads of CDs before that. I honestly can't remember the first single I bought. First album was probably a stones or Beatles or queen best of because I used to like them when dad played them in the car.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:27, Reply)
hey you the rocksteady crew make a break make a move on 7"

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:29, Reply)
Still got, not my first tho,

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:32, Reply)
if memory serves my next purchase was the whistle song by i can't remember who
or maybe six minutes dougie fresh you're on from wh smiths
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:34, Reply)
I treated myself to Doug fresh The show on 12 inch, I liked slick rick, one of the best flowing rappers, mcbeef might disagree

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:40, Reply)
i think it was the inspector gadget theme that did it for me at the time to be honest

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:42, Reply)
And the beatbox surely

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:52, Reply)
of course, and don't call me - oh never mind

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:57, Reply)
I remember buying some sort of Summer Dance hits of the 90s compilation
the X-files theme tune and a load of odd hippy stuff (Fluffy Little Clouds) when I first got a CD player, some point around 1993
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:47, Reply)
How are the orb hippy shit? It was the tune of a summer

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:53, Reply)
they are selling hippy wigs in woolworths, man
www.youtube.com/watch?v=__QqQq9XBsQ
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:56, Reply)
A perfect example of why people shouldn't be so upset over this recent vote

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:01, Reply)
because it ended up on a compilation CD of chillax/peace-with-the-earth tracks
that you could only buy in the hippie shop in Canterbury that stank of joss sticks
EDIT: www.discogs.com/Various-Pure-Moods/release/780619
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:09, Reply)
Wow that's a depressing album, it's the mogadons of music

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:18, Reply)
When I got my first CD player (Amstrad), I rushed out to buy albums by Ace Of Base and Culture Beat.
My collection didn't improve much from there for quite a while, and I spent an embarrassing amount of money on crap CD singles from HMV.
I've never owned a record player, so any vinyl I owned was bought by my parents (a Chas & Dave single, themes from Gerry Anderson shows and an album of kids song - Runaway Train, Ernie, My Boomerang Won't Come Back, etc.).
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:22, Reply)
it may have been a pioneer but it was a good two years between receiving a cd player as a gift
and being able to afford an actual cd. lots of visits to the local library and taping occurred. also due to a crap turntable i would tape what little vinyl i had into oblivion and eventually discovered bass listening mostly to cassettes. loved my walkman.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:29, Reply)
My first "walkman" was a Boots' own brand affair,
that chewed through batteries at a ridiculous rate, on which I listened to copies of my dad's Huey Lewis and Chris Rea albums. Tragic, really.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:35, Reply)
haha! always had those currys or dixons knock offs with almost familiar sounding names
like matsui or sanyo or whatever they were
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:38, Reply)
I had an Alba hi-fi unit that, whilst mostly shit, had some rather good speakers that outlived the rest of it by many years.
Passive speakers, but I had them hooked up to various sources (discman, PC, and such) with better results than I had any right to expect.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 20:46, Reply)
Blondie - Heart of Glass
After hearing it playing on a milk float radio on the way to school.
(, Mon 27 Jun 2016, 0:58, Reply)
Sunday night.
Busy weekend. Knackered. How are you?
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 18:30, Reply)
still oscillating between fury and despair

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 18:30, Reply)
also i need a wee

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 18:31, Reply)
I wasnt happy, chances are it'll be fine.
Too much money, too many people.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:08, Reply)
it's starting to look like
the British public have called both Cameron's and Johnson's bluff, neither of them expected it to actually happen and now they're umming and ahhing and trying to put it off.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:11, Reply)
Exactly. There'll be an exit but it'll be practically unrecognisable from where we were a few months ago.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:16, Reply)
a few months ago i wasn't expecting a Leave vote,
it's pretty unrecognisable already, an absolute shambles, nobody knows what to do next
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:30, Reply)
Carry on as normal and stop panicking?
Nothing has happened yet, and won't for a while. The pound being worth a bit less isn't going to do a huge amount of damage to the everyman. Unless your job relies on overseas funding or investment, just chill.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:32, Reply)
it won't, for a while,
and i just hope Nicola Sturgeon scores a goal before it does because i don't actually want to lose my EU citizenship, my EU voting rights or the protection of the ECHR.

And now you mention it, we were actually kind of hoping on getting EU funding during the coming year. Poor Spacefish.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:35, Reply)
I'm sure the tory government will look after you.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:37, Reply)
not sure if sarcasm

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:37, Reply)
Very much so.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:38, Reply)
rocking in the free world
I've made my own ricotta. About to try to make tortellini. I'm pissed up so this may end poorly but I've made my own cheese which is pretty fly for a shite guy
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 18:33, Reply)
Good man, I've not made any food at all, and so have got to think about going to get something or ordering in.
How's the youngun?
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:06, Reply)
apprehending and apprehensive mean such different things
still, no chance of that esperanto conversion now, eh?
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 18:36, Reply)
I'm not sure I understand.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:07, Reply)
no-one did, that's why it never took off

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:12, Reply)
I haven't really caught the train of this conversation

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:17, Reply)
I was going to just write apprehensive then thought of how inconsistent english can be sometimes

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:20, Reply)
No worries, planearm is here.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:27, Reply)
I'm good piggy, took the kids home, up the juicer

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 18:50, Reply)
Noice

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:07, Reply)
I'm in the kebab shop now, live as it happens mongy news

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 19:21, Reply)
COME ON IRELAND

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 14:03, Reply)
I don't think it'll reach that far soz

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 14:21, Reply)
Typical racist

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 14:27, Reply)
knock the hosts out
that would lol
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 14:29, Reply)
Its ok the refs in frances pocket, cheating french cunts

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 14:35, Reply)
What's Irish for Hoooooooo?

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 15:24, Reply)
Hooooooooooooo'o

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 15:32, Reply)
O'lol

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 15:55, Reply)
they certainly gave that ball a good kicking eh

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 18:05, Reply)
Now that racism is entirely acceptable
What's your favourite race and why
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 11:54, Reply)
100m
it's quick
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 11:58, Reply)
The 12.10 at aintree
Not telling you why.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 12:06, Reply)
egg and spoon

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 12:21, Reply)
because you can run the race and then have some of the necessary equipment to make a cake almost immediately

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 12:24, Reply)
Soz, never did care for UK garage.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 15:07, Reply)
nifel

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 15:30, Reply)
The derby, great horses and it has the feel of the people

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 12:22, Reply)
The Hairy Ainu people of Hokkaido, because lol hairy bums
archive.spectator.co.uk/article/26th-january-1895/7/the-hairy-ainu-the-hairy-ainu-of-the-island-of

Also fascinating from an anthropological perspective
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 12:50, Reply)
It's made me think that anus is now the plural term for ainu
like die/dice
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 12:52, Reply)
"I've got a carrot lodged up my ainu"
"Do you mean anus?"
"Look doc, I know you've got an arsehole for shitting with and another for talking out of, but I've got just the one ainu thank you very much".
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 12:52, Reply)
We made our own tagliatelle last night, it was awesome

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 12:56, Reply)
I heard they're going to ban pasta as unpatriotic. :(

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 16:55, Reply)
oh cor high five to mr mcbeef I've never met anyone else who's heard of them! and yes fascinating

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 16:19, Reply)
I thought these were Ainu, apparently not, but anyway, tits
gakuran.com/ama-the-pearl-diving-mermaids-of-japan/
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 16:23, Reply)
That one where they chase the cheese down a hill.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 13:17, Reply)
Le Mans
cars innit.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 13:29, Reply)
You get a nice watch for taking part and finishing too, engraved which is unusual, very few end up for sale

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 13:36, Reply)
It's nice they get something just for taking part.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 13:59, Reply)
Always liked Spa, it's a good speed circuit with a nice mix of fast and technical corners

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 14:23, Reply)
Morning

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 6:26, Reply)
Alright grrrmachine

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 7:20, Reply)
alright sf
No idea what your previous thread was about, soz
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 8:18, Reply)
morning

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 8:11, Reply)
word

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 8:18, Reply)
#Scemain

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 8:42, Reply)
Scotland don't stand a fucking chance
it's about time they grew up and realised scrounging off someone else n perpetuity isn't the way to solve problems.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 9:03, Reply)
I believe the eu have already pointed out that is not how joining works anyway

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 9:05, Reply)
looks like we're all fucked, either way,
in fact the whole of the EU may be fucked now
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 10:00, Reply)
The eu was fucked before

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 10:02, Reply)
it needed some work,
i'll grant you that, but now, there's no hope whatsoever.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 10:10, Reply)
It needed work 8 years ago
Now its a continent comprised of 0% interest rate economies with dwindling exports, mass youth unemployment, a rising populist movement and completely unsecure borders.

It's had a decade to sort itself out and it did sweet fuck-all about it, because it can't thanks to the inherently unworkable way it was set up.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 10:16, Reply)
Still as a social experiment we've had a lot of lols along the way

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 10:24, Reply)
A fractured continent with the far right gaining ground in multiple territories, Putin will decide that he wants to add a bit more onto his back garden once no-one is prepared to help anyone else
GOOD TOIMES
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 10:04, Reply)
Alright.

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 10:29, Reply)
Morning, Grrr.
The boy is urging me to buy an old Gameboy, so we can cram a Pi Zero into it. Is 10 a good age to learn soldering? What about 38?
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 10:34, Reply)
YES FAM

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 11:41, Reply)
I think I was about 10 when I got a soldering iron
but you'd better be there for the first few times because he'll definitely burn himself.
(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 12:51, Reply)
Has 'brexit' caused a b3ta panic thread buying mentality?

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 2:36, Reply)
Hope you're all having a Brexshit morning!

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 1:45, Reply)
<3

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 2:06, Reply)
I like your new name

(, Sun 26 Jun 2016, 2:39, Reply)

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