I'm watchin' something called "30 minuites meals" with some american pressenter called Racheal Ray.
I'm not sayin' I want to stab her in the face and consolidate all her body parts into one easy stabbable mound, but I'm just sayin', if someone else wants to do that, then I won't stand in their way.
( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Thu 3 Dec 2009, 12:33, Read More)

I've just worked out the number of legs an average dog has
1 legged dog has 16600000 google results
2 legged dog has 3030000 google results
3 legged dog has 14500000 google results
4 legged dog has 15000000 google results
5 legged dog has 11000000 google results
6 legged dog has 12100000 google results
7 legged dog has 9910000 google results
8 legged dog has 10600000 google results
9 legged dog has 6460000 google results
10 legged dog has 13900000 google results

So dogs on average have 5.349 legs.
FACT
(PsychoChomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Wed 2 Dec 2009, 11:24, Read More)

I hate everyone I don't find attractive.

(PsychoChomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Fri 4 Dec 2009, 14:05, Read More)

that's because you can't fry things in wind energy

( Vipros looks like he stands on kids' toys, Wed 2 Dec 2009, 11:44, Read More)

Crow's uninformed, ad hoc "reckon"
In the Western world, where food is plentiful and basic comforts such as shelter, warmth and medicine are easily afforded, we do face a population of increasingly large individuals. This is partly genetic, as people seek taller partners and go on to pop out offspring who will have a genetic predisposition to grow tall themselves, and partly down to the richer diet that is much easier to obtain than it was, say 200 years ago. Like many on this thread, I happen to be about 6'2", and have simply had to get used to the fact that public transport was not designed for legs like mine. Nor, indeed, were many older buses designed to accommodate my neck. But as Chompy says, if it's just 10cm in 2000 years, we'll probably manage.

And before I do start suggesting that we should adjust transport to fit our larger frames, I would be inclined to cite this as a counterexample: what a fat cunt. Seriously, how in the name of jolly-rogering, hairy-ball-bouncing fuck do you expect to fit into a standard aircraft seat like that? Most of us have to pay a surcharge if we have the temerity to put that little bit too much weight in our hand luggage so why the fuck didn't they make him pay a surcharge on his hideously overgrown arse?

I appreciate that everyone's metabolism differs, and that some of us find it easier to lose weight than others; I for one am concerned about the beer belly that's catching up with me after many years of far too much ale. But there's a limit. There's a line that has to be drawn between the challenges of working with your metabolism and natural figure, and just not being able to put the fucking pies down. I'm amazed this gastropod was even able to book his ticket with fingers that must have resembled soggy, wobbling Cornish pasties. Was he able to find his passport in his back pocket or did they have to send a mountaineering expedition round his waist outside passport control? Holy mother of cock, I'm surprised the plane wasn't sagging in the middle where he'd sat down. And he probably smelt funny as well. It's the person sat next to him I feel sorry for.

*mashes face on keyboard*
(The Supreme Crow with all the charm of a musk ox, Tue 1 Dec 2009, 10:57, Read More)

kick her in the fish-mitten

( Vipros looks like he stands on kids' toys, Fri 4 Dec 2009, 15:58, Read More)

Sometimes I feel...
...like putting my fist in her face.
(DrTugnut2 The Thin White Duck, Fri 4 Dec 2009, 14:55, Read More)

or indeed any other subject

(Monty Boyce : the voice of reason as always, Thu 3 Dec 2009, 17:03, Read More)

Well, I haven't spoken to her directly, but...
I have heard (from Ruth, you know, the one in marketing who everyone thinks has a cock) that Sandra was going to give Dave a proper bollocking because she's heard that he's been flirting with Julie, even though he's supposed to be going out with her, but it's not that serious, so Dave doesn't see what the big deal is, but if she does kick off, he's totally prepared because he has the photos from the last office party where she flashed her knickers at Tom, who she really fancies, but 'cause he's already going out with Steph, you know the new girl on reception with the lazy eye and the buck teeth (apparently he nearly got his banjo string caught in the gap between them), and so the only reason Sandra's even going out with Dave is 'cause he's, like, Tom's mate and they go off caravanning together and they're so blatantly having bumsex together, but what she doesn't know is that Tom's actually about ten years older than he looks but he just hangs around with all the others 'cause he's trying to piece his life back together after his wife left him when she caught him having anal sex with a cow.
(The Supreme Crow with all the charm of a musk ox, Thu 3 Dec 2009, 13:39, Read More)

Fuck the position
I'm getting the sock which holds the brick of justice and I'm going to thwak his tits off!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent So my choice is 'Or Death?', Thu 3 Dec 2009, 13:20, Read More)

Thank God we got away from boring old music
and onto THE TOPICS THAT MATTER TODAY.

NO-ONE could ever say THIS ^ is dull. No siree.

EDGE OF THE FUCKING SEAT STUFF.
(Monty Boyce : the voice of reason as always, Thu 3 Dec 2009, 10:33, Read More)

^This is me pretty much all the time when it comes to "Entertainment news"
it's quite a nice feeling really. It must be a bit like how the Swiss felt during the war. They knew something horrible involving lots of people was going on, it just didnt concern them.
( Colonel Dracula Is not as think as you drunk I am, Thu 3 Dec 2009, 9:49, Read More)

Seems Edmund is still trying to get back on /OT
clientcopia.com/quotes.php?id=6979
( The Light In Chains won't play poker with the Skull Spark Joker, Wed 2 Dec 2009, 20:27, Read More)

After they'd met you?
I doubt it.
(PsychoChomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Wed 2 Dec 2009, 13:40, Read More)

It's a motorbike,
duhhh
(PsychoChomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Tue 1 Dec 2009, 16:55, Read More)

No etiquette? Are you mad?
I always hold my pinky finger up when tying the word cunt.
( big-girl's-blouse owns far too much fleece, Tue 1 Dec 2009, 9:41, Read More)

Oi, just because she's a women, it doesn't mean to say she's deffenceless.
I've heard of this women who beat up an entire high school football team and then smashed a litter of kittens (voilent evil kittens) against double glased glass.
( Dance, Gonz, where ever you may be, for you are the lord of the dance settee. Disclaimer: I'm joking, soz for potential offence., Fri 4 Dec 2009, 16:52, Read More)

Going to Gran Canaria
next weekend for our work do.

*vipros'*
(himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 4 Dec 2009, 16:06, Read More)

Awwwwww, poor widdle bayyybeeeeeeeee.
Why don't you try manning the fuck up instead of beating up defenseless women.
( althegeordie is a bully and a cocksucker, Fri 4 Dec 2009, 15:56, Read More)

I'm going to a 50's night and trying not to get so drunk I hit on one of my best mates sisters.

(PsychoChomp **bearer of the waki crown**, Fri 4 Dec 2009, 15:51, Read More)